ZION, THE PROMISED LAND–Responding to inquiries as to why He purposely made Jesus bad at shooting free throws, God Almighty said…
NFL Recommends Relaxing Use Of Helmets and Other Safety Equipment In Elementary School Football So Players Can Get Used To Life As A Pro Footballer, Living With CTE Much Earlier
Rad: 11 Awesome Calendar Dates That Only 90s Kids Would Have Been Totally Clinically Alive For
If you were alive and breathing and not dead or hadn’t yet been born on these dates, you are so a…
Study: After initial reports that ‘HOLY FUCKING SHIT FUCK ME FUCK ON PISS AND SHIT ON DICK GOD FUCKING DAMN IT’ Scientists Can Now Confirm ‘FUCKING COME ON YOU MOTHERFUCKER FUCKING YES!!!!’
SUNSHINE COAST, AUSTRALIA– In a study published this morning in the Australia Journal of Science, scientists’ initial findings that ‘HOLY FUCKING…
Facebook Introduces New Algorithm That Pre-Emptively Calculates How Suicidal Your Photos Will Make Your Friends
An Open Letter From Albert Camus To Freddie Mercury: “Thanks For Making A Musical Version Of The Outsider With Bohemian Rhapsody, But Dude, Have You Actually Even Read It? Because You Totally Screwed Up Its Timeline.”
By Albert Camus Hey Freddie Mercury, You know what, fuck you. Bohemian Rhapsody is fucking cool and all, but your…
Area Man Eliminated from Life After 110-77 Blowout Loss to Pancreatic Cancer
CHULA VISTA, CA–Area Man, Tarek Shearer, 41, has suffered a disappointing loss in the middle stages of his life, losing 110-77 to…
WTF! The Jonas Brothers Just Posted Pics From Their Wild Night Out in Vegas and You’re Not Going To Believe Blah Blah Fucking Blah… Wow! Kim Kardashian Just xa^&%@!$^ih3rihu1298%&# !(#&*^@$&(*!h8… AND Oh My God! Ariana Grande Fuck You.
Running Out The Clock: 11 Things to Do While You Wait to Die
Getting conceived as a result of your mother and father making the naked sex into each other, and then being pushed…
The Philosophy of: Anna Karenina’s Karenin on Misfortune
It is a fortune that may befall anybody. And this misfortune has befallen me. The only is how best to…