***I DON’T HAVE UEFA’S PRIOR WRITTEN CONSENT TO USE, TALK OR THINK ABOUT ANY NAMES, IMAGES OR VIDEOS PUBLISHED IN MY EURO 2020 PREVIEW, SO FOR COPYRIGHT REASONS, FROM HERE ON IN, THE TOURNAMENT WILL BE REFERRED TO AS EURLO 2020***
Welcome to my daily Eurlo 2020 Wrap. Here’s what happened on Day 3. You’re welcome.
Day 3
Sunday 13 June
Group D
White Team That Every Time Is Going to Win It All 🏥 1-0 🇭🇷 Still Not Over the Break Up And Just Feels Like A Big Loser Team (15:00, Wembley Stadium, London)
🏥 Sterling 57′
Finally after 53 years, the psycho, fucked up chacma baboon is off the back for England, after winning their opening Euro group game for the first time.
Group C
Please Don’t Think of Hitler When You Watch Us Play Come On Move on Please Team 🇦🇹 3-1 🇲🇰 Goran Pandev Team (And Nation) (18:00, National Stadium, Bucharest)
🇦🇹 Lainer 18′, 🇲🇰 Pandev 28′, 🇦🇹 Gregoritsch 78′, 🇦🇹 Arnautovic 89′
Use the slider to see what Austria (the cunts) did to Goran Pandev today. He was happy, they made him sad. Assholes.
Group C
Team That’s Waiting For Jaap Stam’s Euro 2000 Penalty To Return to Earth from the Andromeda Galaxy Before It Starts Trying Again 🇳🇱 🇺🇦 Yellow Team (Group C) (21:00, Amsterdam Arena, Amsterdam)
Denzel Dumfries scores the winner after an inspired late challenge by the Ukrainians
🇳🇱 Wijnaldum 52′, 🇳🇱 Weghorst 58′, 🇺🇦 Yarmolenko 75′, 🇺🇦 Yaremchik 79′ 🇳🇱 Dumfries 85′
Day 4’s upcoming fixtures:
Monday 14 June
Group D
Team William McCrum 👴🏻 🇨🇿 Seriously We Are Never Going To Do Anything Better Than Winning The European Championships With The Original Panenka (No One Is) Team (15:00, Hampden Park, Glasgow)
Group E
The Team Who Have United Northern Ireland and Republic Of Ireland 🇸🇰 x 🇵🇱 Team GLARGLOMORK (18:00, Saint Petersburg Stadium, Saint Petersburg)
Group E
Team Forever Cursed by the Demons of 2008-2012 🇪🇸 🇸🇪 Team Wait Where The Fuck is Zlatan Is Zlatan Not Playing? Fuck (21:00, Stadium La Cartuja, Seville)