Hello, how are you I am fine thank you, and you? I am fine thankyou. I am live in Espain now for almost 6 years and I like share my brain thinkings with you, of the lives in Espain, no? YOu listen me! I explain you!
DO you thinking is meaning of lives? Is meaning? OR is adsurd like ALbert CAmus say, SIsypus push rock up and down mountain, and no greater divine design, just struggle IS the meaning? Maybe meaning come from community, faith/spirutality and art, like NIck CAve think? OR maybe something in between, or meaning come from contribution and giving back if one can, like this guy PEter Singer say? OR maye utilatrian approach, and doing more good than bad? OR maybe LIke KAnt say and Categonsical Imperative, do things you thing whole world should do?
THIs confusing me
WAIT. I hear something.
I am in basemant on internet in cold and darkness and I think i hear my wife coming down… wait… ok she gone.. she talk to her stupids sister in SRemski Karlovci. THEY TALK maybe 5 or 10 hours a day. what about i dont know, comparing price of vegetables in her village and ours, and who they see down at the river tossing garbage in water. i dont know i not like the gossip, except the FAcebook! I love FAcebook, but FAcebook is not gossip. FAcebook is news and most important issue in world, not gosiping about who they see throwing garbage down town well. LAst week i see a videpo of man being arrest by police man and he try grab gun of police man and smash police man against car try knock out like Mike TYson PUnch OUt, but police man who is weak boy, take gun and shoot bad man. THIs is news and must see this to know what is happening in world.
ANYways back to my subect in first place. Where does meaning come from? or purpose? IS life for nothgin or is commitment to something bigger than just solipsistic way to live? I struggle with this now ,more than ever in my lifes. Chunky my other dog ( not Viktor, Viktor is just dog who live in front garden who come down to basement and attack my wife when she come down to yell on me and kick me and pick up chair and try smash me or when i hide under table, she try to poke me with legs of chair, while she keep talking to her stupid sister in SREmski KArlovci
THIs VIktor:
tHese days I search for meaning or something bigger. MY dog, most important thing in my life, CHUnky, get sick and is struggling, and he not the same dog as before, because can’t be active. BUt we try do everything we can to help him be happy, and he happy dog (not like VIktor, who go HAU HAU HAU And jump to attack face of wife when she come down to hit me because i use internet). ALSo some people who I thought were feriends before, show insulting, ignorant and disrpectful side and insult something most close to me (judaism and ISrael) so how they say in AMEica tv show FRiends, ‘those motherfuckers can go fuck themselves’. you know this episode? Ross and JOey go to ICe hockey match, and yelling at ice hockey sports players. Was translated into Serbijan so something like this. ALso, alone more than ever, more in love with LOrena than ever (not wife, wife is upstairs), but no in person conection of depth. just text messages, on WHAtsapp. CONNection to faith more than ever, want to have child but not easy, loving DAVid Foster WAllace more than ever, KIng David PSalms, OLd TEStament found new sport, FLAg FOotball, love it, but not connect to play cricket because this sport where goal is to not move and i need to move and run and distract brain.
BUT I still look for meaning or purpose or light. IT is there and I am circling it. THIS maybe just period. CHAllenge that has been given to me as a gift.
BUT if you see meaning, send me comments on my YOUtube profile. and also dont forget smash that likebutton and share and sussribe and send this in email to your work colleagues!