Family mourns man who met partner exactly when he was perfectly ready, got and lost his job when perfectly ready, partner left him when perfectly ready and ultimately died exact moment he was ready

7-Year-Old In That Zone Where Disjointed Ramblings And Unpredictable Behaviour About To Crossover From Impossibly Adorable to Suddenly Super Fucking Mega Annoying (And Parents About To Go From ‘Ahh The Miracle Of Childbirth! How Happy We Are To Be A New Family!’ To ‘Oh Vengeful One Above, Why Hast Thou Smoten Us and With Looking After This Human Trashbag Of Sewerage?’

My Say: What Do You Mean ‘Why Is The Mona Lisa Famous?’ Because It’s Famous For Being Famous For Being Famous. Idiot. Fuck You. (By Marshall McWilliamson)

My Say  By Marshall McWilliamson       Geez you piss me off sometimes. What do you mean by ‘Why … More

I am Dan Reynolds of Imagine Dragons, Type Anything At Me!

Hey Why You Do It, I’m Dan Reynolds, I’m a musician and okay, shit, here we go.. Type Anything at … More

My Say: Oh Man, I Just Knew Today Was Going To Be Shitty As Soon As I Went Downstairs To The Basement First Thing This Morning And Found My Dad Sitting Ominously On A Couch Next To A Bloody, Lifeless Mountain Gorilla He Had Presumably Just Murdered (by Edwin Murray)

My Say By Edwin Murray God damn it. This morning I woke up at my usual time of 7:15am and … More

Confirmed: Study Finds You Only Weird Person In World

SAN DIEGO, CA–Concluding their study into your life from the day you were born, behavioural scientists from San Diego State … More

Love is in the Air: New Dating App Hurry The Fuck Up Launches, Designed Specifically For Singles Too Busy To Use A Dating App

Listen up all you go-getting singles, because this is going to be music to your ears! Created specifically for those … More

Do You Have What It Takes To Be In A Mediocre, Mundane and Unsatisfying Relationship That Drags On For Five Years Too Long Because You’re Terrified Of Being Alone? Take The Quiz And Find Out!

Let’s face it, staying in a mediocre, uninteresting and mundane relationship isn’t easy. It takes a terrifying fear of being … More

Biologists Confirm Prior To Evolution Of First Domestic Cat, Dog’s Arch Nemesis Was Baby Leatherback Sea Turtle

Local Man Completes 625th Page Of His First Ever Tolstoy Book And He Can Conclude: ‘People Right. Tolstoy Long. But Tolstoy Good. Tolstoy Long, But Tolstoy Good. Tolstoy Long. And Tolstoy Good.’