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Time’s Up, Buddy: After Errant Pass In Today’s La Liga Match Against Espanyol, FC Barcelona Finally Decide To Get Rid Of Argentinian Disaster Lionel Messi

BARCELONA, SPAIN–Wow, just when you thought Lionel Messi may have done enough to salvage his horrendous disaster of a career at FC Barcelona, he goes and confirms why everyone has wanted him gone from the moment he arrived at the club.

Misdirecting a pass that almost lead to a shot on goal by the opposition in the 80th minute of today’s La Liga match against Espanyol, Messi’s latest humiliating blunder is even further proof why the termination of his contract with Barça is surely now finally a done deal. It’s been nothing but nightmare after horrific nightmare for Messi at the Noucamp, and this most recent horror show may finally be the straw that broke the undersized, large-eared camel’s back.

You’re time’s finally up, little Argentinian child boy man!

Since he signed for Barcelona back in 2004, it’s been nothing but a string of calamitous disasters on the field for this microscopic bearded dufus. An unmitigated tragedy from the moment he got to La Masìa, over the past 15 years Messi has misguided several passes (a couple of them even leading to turnovers), never scored by throwing the ball directly in the net from a throw-in, barely scored any goals with his head, been injured more than once, hasn’t won any international tournaments with his country, lost the 2006 UEFA Super Cup Final, hasn’t been crowned English Premier League player of the year even once, has failed to score a hat-trick in every game he’s played, didn’t put away a penalty for France in the penalty shootout of the 1982 World Cup Semi-Final against Germany and has not once made a scorpion-kick goalkeeping save like Rene Higuita did at Wembley in 1995.

Ugh, what a waste of a player. Time to finally hit the road, jack!

Hopefully the diminutive number 10’s latest nightmarish error that almost lead to a cross into the box by the opposition but was seconds later recovered by a teammate today is the final nail in the coffin in the ghastly holocaust of a career that has been Lionel Messi’s at FC Barcelona.

C’mon Barça, it’s time to finally show this piece-of-shit catastrophe of a footballer the door. Just don’t let it hit you when you leave, small Argentinian infant man!